Kohina saves shit week for seasonal anime, NEETflix back on the menu

By John Miller

Sunday the 20th of May 2018

 

I guess the entire anime industry got together and agreed to phone in their lowest possible effort this week. Lucky for me I know how to work a Queue. Lo and behold, even managed to find a show resembling the only seasonal that consistently grinds out entertainment. A lot of you are looking for something similar to Best Seasonal Hinamatsuri, and Gugure! Kokkuri-san (Fall 2014) is it.

 

This clever girl of a Supernatural SOL comedy by Writer/Director Yoshimasa Hiraike was adapted from the manga of Midori Endo, and the similarities between Gugure! and Hinamatsuri even on a superficial level are glaringly obvious. Both have as their protag a highly autistic doll-like girl who becomes the daughterfu of an unlikely father figure.

Here is your clip.

 

In the case of orphan Kohina she summons the ghost of Japanese fox deity, and the dark and explicit Japaneseyness of the show is what really gets it over. While I can totally see Hinamatsuri being ruined in the future by Hollywood remaking it with Nitta as a mob Captain and Hina going to school in Manhattan or some shit, Gugure! could never be remade as anything other than a Japanese story.

Kohina soon adds a lascivious dog ghost and a scamming tanuki ghost to her harem of carers. The cast of characters is long and weird and includes a girl who tries to bully her with flowers, an alien class-mate, and a cat-ghost who wants to add Kohina to her doll collection. Here they are dancing around with Kohina and Kokkuri-san in the the OP. It’s 12 episodes of pure autistic Japcom kino.

 

Hinamatsuri was solid as fuck comedy feels drama again,  with all the characters moving along what is the most captivating and satisfying story arc in seasonal anime desus.

The other three shows that I haven’t dropped seven weeks into Spring were all kinds of uninspiring. Comic Girls wasn’t terrible, but it was so good last week with the Horror Manga theme that I wanted more than Kaos sitting in an anti-bully box. I’m not saying I didn’t like it, I’m just saying.

 

WIXOSS is my undroppable show. I came to it with low expectations as a Saturday morning ha-fuck-the-plot-dude-magic Batoru type show, and as long as they have one episode like the second one each season where they pull some of the dark Cthulhu shit they did so well in Selector and give me Batoru every other episode I can still enjoy the threads.

The last two episodes have both been kind of meh, and Layla versus Tama should have been EPIC, but JC Staff made it lame as all hell. BOOOOO.

Happyfag Kiyoi made me kek though, and kidnappy Aki is best Aki I guess.

 

DITF is also undroppable, but for different reasons. It’s an anime phenomenon that is fun to be a part of, but whether it will turn out to be a phenomenal train wreck or the saviour of anime is still up in the air right now.

Episode 18 of DITF was sort of lame, but also sort of good?? It’s like those formula TV shows where something watchable happens but then everything ends up the way it was before anything happened. Ha check it out I’m professing my undying love for you. Dude no worries, let’s just carry on like normal. I’ll allow it, but for stealing focus right before her friend’s wedding, I’m demoting Ikuno from Best Girl.

Here’s your shiptastic moment, Ichikunofags.

 

The new Best Girl – for the first and last week ever – is of course the blushing bride Kokoro. ANNND right about now the episode starts to go pear-shaped.

Dude let’s get married, and…….O SHIT here come the suddenly ridiculously overpowered Nines to school weakfag Zero Tsu in Karate. Eh, OK.

And star-wipe…and now we all in mech camp and nothing really happened again. It all felt kind of rushed and ill-thought out TBQH.

 

This may not be a problem for viewer numbers amongst anime secondaries, but with the Kyotofags looking for any sign of plotshitting from Trigger to deride the franchise and claw back lost ground, episode 18 simply didn’t do enough to get the Darling franchise over and win it the AOTX strap that it is so agonisingly close to.

It wasn’t all bad though. Here is the exact moment that the heart of priest-mode Fatoshi breaks, and Zoro getting butt-stroked to the head. Come on, if you were that APE goon you would have done it too.

 

Which brings us to NEETflix. I really don’t know why I bother with this garbage. So far I’ve watched the first three minutes of about ten shows. It all adds up, you know.

Can we just agree that Netflix only knows how to write characters who sound like first year college students that just came home from a Bernie Sanders rally and want to argue about politics? What the fuck Netflix, even in your historically themed dramas I have to listen to this psycho-babble.

I might possibly like the Alienist, which has been on the background because my first ten choices were Netflix QUALITY and I gave up. It actually looks pretty neat, but I’ll have to get back to you about that with confirmation once I listen to the dialogue. Otherwise I’m re-watching Full Metal Jacket. Maybe VEG.

 

Full disclosure: John Miller’s IRL name is Frank Faulkner. I’m an Aussie who’s keen on Conservative politics, Trump, and the Anime Right. Netflix is garbage though.

 

 

 

 

 

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