By John Miller
Wednesday the 20th of December, 2017
In the latest example of Extreme Winning, President Trump has just successfully dispatched the Vice President to the Senate to crush the last elements of the Resistance in the Congress. With the Tax Cuts already sailing through the House, the Faction for Socialism in America made their last stand on the Senate Floor, and were completely annihilated, Praise Jesus.
The Bolshevik scum were no match for the ice cool Smug Pence, or his Sergeant at Arms, who was kept busy ejecting wailing protesters from the chamber.
The price of Salt, already ridiculously depressed by the dismantling of Obamanet, was sent to a seventeen-year low, as the Party of Dukakis decided the only reasonable course of action was to chant Don’t Kill Us over and over, and howl with grief and indignation, in response to a Bill that that literally sends the wealth of America back into the hands of the American people.
Pence laughed internally as he crushed this petty revolt of the Party of Tax theft, and unleashed a deluge of American prosperity for the President, the like of which has not been seen anywhere since that glorious day when Reagan declared it was Morning in America.
Yessir, it’s once again Morning in America, and President Trump has delivered the Christmas Tax Cuts on time and under budget. With economic growth already doubling and tripling, and American prosperity restored, the New Year is full of promise.
Time now though to enjoy our bountiful harvest of Christmas Salt, and our eggnog and ham, and those sweet liberal tears.
Merry Christmas everybody, and may big government stay off your back and out of your pockets in the New Year.
Full disclosure: John Miller’s IRL name is Frank Faulkner. I’m an Aussie and when I’m not obsessing about Conservative politics or defending Trump I also enjoy various sports and Christian activities.