By John Miller
Monday the 6th of November, 2017
Notorious FAG leader and rape enabler Alec Baldwin took time out from his busy routine of making little girls cry and screeching into the TV cameras live from New York on Saturday night to dramatically quit twitter, which had the audacity to remind him of his hypocrisy, his history of violence towards women, and all his sterling work as a rape enabler over the years.
The less talented brother of Billy Baldwin and guiding light of the #Resistance Rapey Left has also been a well-known mocker of President Trump. The Donald has occasionally deigned to notice his poor ratings at SNL, and his other failing projects.
Other Friends of Harvey including Roman Polanski and James Toback arrived too late to the twitter fight between Alec and the women his friend Harvey Weinstein raped. Alas, they could not prevent the internet from bullying Alec off twitter.
No word yet from Harvey Weinstein himself, who has been laying low after being completely cured by a week of therapy.
As for Alec, he has vowed to re-commit himself to gender equality, and he can still be seen on some failing piece of garbage sitcom that runs on some failing piece of garbage network.
Was Alec trying to warn us all along via his character Jack on 30 Rock? You be the judge:
Jack (Baldwin): “In order for this merger to stay attractive to our friends at CableTown, we have to seem like a sexy, profitable company—and we’re almost pulling it off. The Harry Potter theme park is huge hit with both anglophiles and pedophiles.”
His fellow FAG member Matt Damon kept rolling with the pedo jokes in the same episode:
Carol (Damon): “All right, let’s each say one thing about ourselves that the other person doesn’t know, on the count of three. All right, ready? One, two, three.”
Liz: “I’m on a waiting list to adopt a kid.”
Damon: “Touched by a priest; it’s fine.”
Maybe you ought to give the comedy a rest. This is no laughing matter.
Fellow FAG member Sean Penn has gone to ground too, since the memoir of a fellow actor, Curtis Armstrong, came out this year. Armstrong sought to make the astonishing claim that Penn once advised his friend Tom Cruise to coerce actress Rebecca De Mornay into having sex, while filming the 1983 cult classic Risky Business.
The original passage, cut out before publication, was published by Page Six last June.
Quoting Penn’s advice to Cruise on the subject of De Mornay:
“Just tell her either she [*****] you or she’s off the picture.”
Penn’s lawyer answered the allegation thusly:
“Although prepared to take all appropriate legal action, Mr. Penn was pleased that Mr. Armstrong chose to do the right thing and thereby made litigation unnecessary.”
Well now I don’t know what to believe. Thanks for ruining my leisure time, Hollyweird.
Full disclosure: John Miller’s IRL name is Frank Faulkner. I currently live in Australia and I write about things that concern me as a Christian, or as a cranky guy. These days I spend all my spare time defending the best (and only worthy) President of the United States since Reagan. Totally worth it. Bring back that 80s prosperity and the Moral Majority, Mr President. Christians4Trump. MAGA.