Bethesda does vidya like ESPN does football: Wolfenstein II spits in your face and calls it Apple Pie

By John Miller

Sunday the 29th of October, 2017

 

Forget about Normandy and all those Americans who died fighting to save Europe from the real Nazis, the deranged Left have arrived from the countries that sat out the war against Hitler in comfort, and they’re here to tell us who the real Nazis are: Americans

So kudos to you Jens Matthies and Jerk Gustafsson, and everybody else responsible for the one hundred million dollar mega-flop that so far has limped to a dismal 40K sales. You may have single-handedly finished off what remained of the gaming industry after Gamergate, with your boring preachy one hour and twenty minutes of garbage, but by God you guys created a hilarious AntiFa recruitment video.

jensmatthies360654_screen

The best time yet set for defeating America, sorry, the Nazis, is less than 80 minutes. The game is so Current Year that players are mostly only interested in seeing who can complete it fastest so they can go and get their money back.

Is there a single good review of it on Steam that wasn’t written by a blatant shill? Not that I’ve seen.

Is every vidya journalist giving the edgy content three thumbs up? Who cares.

Will the creepy shower-time creeps at NeoGAF ever recover? They probably have bigger problems right now.

I give Wolfenstein II a base mark of 2/7 because I used to enjoy shooting Nazis once upon a time, and -7 marks for getting everything wrong about vidya and condensing it into the worst possible product you could ever imagine.

Wolfenstein II is a steaming pile of garbage made by the same people who ruined football, late night television, and now vidya.

Wolfenstein II gets my lowest possible score: -5/7

maxresdefault

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s